The Sailing Me

April 18, 2014

“I wish everyone who knew me could know the me!”

I posted this on Facebook today. It was one of those thoughts that popped into my head ready to publish, and didn’t require a lot of fact checking. As the day passed though, I found myself coming back to that thought. What makes the sailing me noteworthy, why do I prefer it to the geeky me, or the business me, or the city slicker me?

I think in large part sailing has brought me perspective. I lose that perspective if I spend too much time in the city, or at my job, or anywhere where a lot of people agree that certain things are important. I’m lucky that my job reinforces that saving the planet is important, I can get behind that, but it’s still not exactly the perspective that I get from sailing.

Sailing, for me, is:

…about time. I see my when I’m sailing. I don’t mean that I don’t get to see them enough during the work week, I mean that, when I’m sailing, I. see. them. I see how incredibly witty and coy Miles is, and how clever and musical Ruby is. I realize that I’ve told Ruby to stop singing, and Miles to stop clowning about a dozen times, but really they are just doing what they are best at, and it’s awesome!

…about getting to know people. There are these two guys that I say hi to at least twice a day. They are friendly and look out for us and our kids, but I don’t really ever get to chat because I’m busy coming or going. Today, they are anchored a few boats away. We stopped by in the sailing dinghy on the way to play in the surf, and chatted… for the first time! Later, they helped us out when the dinghy tires needed air. I love that about this lifestyle, there are no excuses not to get to know your neighbors. 

…about taking things slowly. Really slowly. Today’s schedule was: Make coffee; Eat breakfast; Sail Fatty; Clean Fatty; Halyard Jump & Swim; Walk on the Beach; Eat Dinner. That’s it. It took all day, partially because sailing fatty in 3 knots of wind is a time consuming prospect, but it was good!

…about not having much, but loving and leaning on the things I have. I love our boat. I love my computer. I love my camera. I love my uke and my guitar. I don’t have a lot of stuff, but I know WHY I have it all, and I never feel like it owns me (any more). When I lived in a giant house and had a ton of stuff (multiples of some) I always felt conflicted; “should I be playing my guitar instead of watching a movie on the home theater?” Now my stuff enables me, and I use it hard. 

…about competence and immediacy. When I’m sailing, I know just what requires my attention at any time and I generally know how to handle it. Whether it is a refrigerator not refrigerating, or a squall on the horizon, or a kid with a nasty cut. The things that matter are clear and obvious, and the best course of action is, similarly, obvious. In our modern world, so few people ever get to experience this clarity, nor the feeling of competence that comes with really feeling like you are up to any challenge that life might throw at you. 

Time to Sail Away?

Vick joked that she bought enough provisions for a weekend on or crossing the Indian Ocean. I won’t lie and say that a 24 day passage didn’t really sound appealing, it did. But I’m not done here. I love how Ruby’s ‘no’ and ‘home’ use all of the vowels (“Noaeiu”) and I want both kids to feel a little bit Australian before we leave (They sang We Are All Australian this morning, and it nearly made me cry). Vick and I have some deeper roots to sink here as well, and some money to save (any day now). But I do think that every trip out of the river breathes a little life back into me and reminds me where my values lie. Sailing is like coming home to me, coming home to myself.

Comments

comments

6 comments

  1. Comment by svceolmor

    svceolmor April 18, 2014 at 11:16 am

    Love this. So glad you got to be reacquainted with the “real” you.

  2. Comment by @DeirdreS

    @DeirdreS April 18, 2014 at 12:17 pm

    ” I don’t have a lot of stuff, but I know WHY I have it all, and I never feel like it owns me (any more).” http://t.co/phFVp8JUh4

  3. Comment by MaryJane Renz Schleich via Facebook

    MaryJane Renz Schleich via Facebook April 19, 2014 at 6:52 am

    Loved it Tucker. You and the family are an inspiration to me. Love and blessings on you and yours this holy season.

  4. Comment by Lynn Bernard

    Lynn Bernard April 19, 2014 at 1:26 pm

    We sooo miss you but are sooo glad you are where you are, doing what you are doing! Very few people can do what they want when they want and you are fortunate that you can raise your children w/ that spirit… much love, Me’me’re and Pe’pe’re

  5. Comment by Ben Sanchez

    Ben Sanchez April 22, 2014 at 1:31 pm

    Nice article Tuc. (Not that I’m surprised.) You’re really an inspiration to me. Not that I’m planning to sail away any time soon (but I’ve been salivating over a hobie by neighbor had given to him. He wants me to figure out how to put it together and show him how to sail it. I can’t wait for summer. :-))

    It’s the priority you’ve always managed to put on living your life with family and friends. It’s always more important to have a great expirence than to save money, or work more just becuase you have more time, or to say to heck with traditional financial and family planning logic, quit your (very good) job and sail off around the globe with your family.

    Love you man. Take care of sv. Conviva and her crew. It’s precious to more than just you.

    (You inspire folks you don’t even know too. My wife often can’t recall your names, never having met you, However, she does talk about “the sailing family” a lot. 🙂 Always with a smile, or how cool is that?)

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